Interesting post. I, too, never recognized abuse in my family or relationships. I had to ask my sister and brother about how life was at home when growing up, because I had no idea how I was raised. My sister-in-law asked me not to ask my brother anymore questions, cuz it was making him very depressed. I still don't know and can't find my life as a child..But, I have moved on.. I guess it isn't necessary for me to know.. I just don't understand why I couldn't recognize abuse in my adult relationships. You would think one would be observant as to how others live and see that how one is living isn't right.. You would even think that one would know tht black eyes, fractured bones, etc, just isn't right.. But, I didn't.. Makes me feel sooo stupid to have not recognized it before I was middle aged. I know not to hit others, but didn't know it wasn't ok for others to hit me.. Isn't that just so weird? Gosh, it wasn't until I was in my mid 40's that I learned about setting my boundries and that I even had rights as a person.....I have recognized that I don't have feelings related to any of the abuse in my life. I can see it, but I can't feel it.. I thought I was just a positive type person, but guess I was also blind to some of the realties of my life...