I can relate to this so completely. I have one friend who I feel I can discuss this with. I told her that I find social situations difficult and I don't make a good impression when I meet people. She told me when she first met me I came across as aloof, which was an eye-opener for me as I hadn't really considered it, but now I see that is what people think before they get to know me (few people get that far)
Hugs for you Hazelgirl. You're not a freak, you are just learning to value yourself.