Man... I'd say you ought to look to yourself... look to your own needs, desires, feelings and way of living. If you are not happy, YOU have to do something. Expecting him to make you happy obviously isn't working.
Maybe, and, I mean no disrespect or "jab" at you with this... You cannot control his actions. He does that. You control your own. So... maybe... you CAN... try to do with him, what you want so badly for him to do with you: Show some interest in him. Let him know he is important to you (Is he? Still? Ask yourself that question, too.). Use kind words... find something positive about him. I'm pretty sure he is human and needs to feel loved, too, just as you and I do. You say you're sure he loves you... You said your heart is still in love with him. Are you in love with him enough to try to understand, even accept, his porn viewing habits? You KNOW he watches it... even said you could be okay with it if you don't have to know about it (Screaming oxymoron, right there ... or is it a paradox ) or view it... that's sort of like pretending to be in denial about it... maybe, if you ask me. If you know he watches porn, are okay with it if you don't know about it... then why get upset when you find out he's watching it. You already know. What's the point? Either you're okay with it, period... or you're not okay with it. May I sugguest you not take his porn viewing habits so personally, either. Hello? He's a man. It's porn. Plus, didn't you mention something about you two having sex maybe once or twice a year? Heck... I'd be watching porn, too... were I in those shoes of yours or his. I'd try watching it with him, sometime, you know? Only you get to pick the ...whatever it's called... style? variety? the action on screen. Also, his looking a pornography doesn't necessarily mean he's getting erections... if that's been an issue. Have you asked him if he gets hard and orgasms with porn? Too shocking a question? Not to gain insight... and understanding about the person your heart loves deeply. People who love each other ought to be able to talk about ANYthing w/o fear of judgment and all those other nasty feeling adjectives that tend to come into play. Talk... and, listen.
My point is... that YOU have to DO something different in order to change this situation. You must decide what you can and will live with (or without) and then DO something in that respect. Figure out what you want. You cannot control anyone's actions but your own... don't forget.
As far as going online for emotional and sexual intimacy... probably not going to serve to quell the needs and desires you seek to soothe within yourself. Feels a little like revenge, payback... not very productive to the problem at hand. Plus, then... there you've got another person with a heart, feelings, emotions, et all, involved. Sounds miserable.

NOTE: Just saw the brownie post. Awesome! And the smart-*** inside of me wants to say, "...what nerve he has treating you that way."
(I mean that nicely, sincerely ... and to help make my point... )
Best to you always.