This seems to be a week when quite a few of us have had difficult emotional sessions.
Me, too.

T and I had a miscommunication (again!) where I thought I understood something she had said that hurt my feelings and angered me. It was serious enough (if what I believed had been true) that I considered quitting therapy. I was a complete mess for several days and I cried buckets through the entire subsequent session.

When I checked with her I found out she didn't mean it the way I heard it. Again.

She was very nice about it, saying she could understand how it could have come across to me as negative and scolding. She was sorry. She would understand if I didn't return to therapy or call her again- that it was my choice. But she would still very much like to work with me.

She reassured me that her boundary about this particular issue has not changed.. ( I thought she had changed the boundary- and I felt scolded, stupid and naive.) She repeated a few times, "This isn't your fault." "You didn't do anything wrong.

She said that sometimes I tend to hear things as a negative and then make it my fault...

Some of you may know this isn't the first time I have misunderstood her statements or read more into her reactions. I will be asking her...why does she think I continue to do this? Augh!

I am proud of myself for going back to therapy and double-checking the facts with her- when I really wanted to run the other way. I hate confrontation and I suck at being assertive...I really didn't want to go. But I feel that our working through this is helping me develop trust, security and causing us to feel closer. I was comforted by her heartfelt reassurances.

Anyway, this is a brief recap of an emotional session.