I consider there to be a bigger distance between wants and needs. I can take care of my own needs barring extremely unusual circumstances like being in a coma. I don't find it selfish to do so, I just don't see what the point of involving others would be. With wants, sometimes other people could be not unuseful even if not an actual requirement. So if I want to be not lonely, I call a friend and we go biking or something. The therapist has said it appears I don't ask for help, but I just do not see that I require help very often. I would seek assistance if it was required. But if not required, why would I choose to muck things up by adding in more people?