Continual conflict is actually a common way that people satisfy their needs to be in an interaction even if it is negative. Just like a child who acts out is gaining from the attention even if negative. People who are in conflict like this usually have poor boundaries and are "emeshed" even if they seem apart. They often have unstated and therefore unmet needs and this is their attempt to satisfy them. Good news is that it can be changed and is not inevitable.
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“Our knowledge is a little island in a great ocean of nonknowledge.” – Isaac Bashevis Singer
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