I've never been clinically diagnosed, but if it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and swims like a duck, I probably have NPD. My narcissism has grown and changed as I have. In my 20's I was completely insane. By insane I mean, I had somewhat of a death wish. Theses days I'm a lot calmer and so is it. My emotions have changed as well, or "retreated" shall I say. The older I get the less I feel. Am I alone in this?