I can't answer for you, but for me...
My mother was an abused and neglected child. She was born at the tail end of a very large family of mostly girls and the little boy born right before her died of SIDS. My grandfather never forgave her for being a girl - he worked her like a man (he was a farmer) and beat her for trying to act like a boy. She was never trusted to go out by herself - my aunts were expected to keep an eye on her so she wouldn't 'get herself into trouble', that is, get herself pregnant messing around with the boys.
My mother tried to make me into the girl she never got to be. Not only did she fail miserably, she passed on her mistrust and possibly even hatred of her own gender, leaving me feeling out of place in my own skin and among women and distrustful yet envious of men. She wanted me to be the girl she never got to be, but she was too resentful of me to actually let it happen.
I'm less sure about my father, but I think my grandmother tried to make him into the boy that *she* wanted to be, setting him up for my mother to try place him in the role of the father that she wanted. And she died very young, when my dad was just barely out of his teens.
Gah, what a mess... I had a mother who badly needed to be parented herself and a father too weak to define his own role. And they both spent years in religious life before they were married. So in a way I was raised like a candidate for the novitiate.