My first question would be what harm is there for you in being "too" invested?

You worry about being too close, but what is the actual fear. If you get "too close" what are you afraid will happen, and is that happening?

I've had that fear, but haven't found it's been fulfilled. I'm in frequent contact with her, and she's supportive, helpful and I'm certainly drawn to her.

But, she can't pay my bills, sleep with my husband, raise my kid, show up at work, or do my homework. And while I have *felt* upset by conversations we've had, I've never ceased functioning beyond needing some time to cry or rest.

So, I think the test is: are you functioning worse because you depend on her, or do you have good reason to believe you will? Is she helping you with what you want help with? Or, is there evidence of actual potential harm: is she encouraging you not to make any decisions without her, to isolate from other people or to stop functioning in any healthy ways?

Something to keep in mind is that dependence is a normal, healthy part of many therapeutic relationships: the reliance enables us to make changes we couldn't on our own. You're afraid, you mention, of not being able to work on things on your own- but isn't that what you signed up for? If you could have fixed your issues alone.... you would have. There's nothing wrong with the fact that you couldn't, but the reality is, that means you do need to trust someone to help you, and with time, you will be able to build that skillset for yourself and reach out elsewhere, outside of therapy, for help.