I understand completely......I've noticed that I feel like everyone in my life hates me when I'm in a depressed state. I'm aware that it's irrational, it sounds like you are too. That awareness seems to only help on a minute level though the best I've been able to do is to continue to have positive interactions with people. I have to fight the urge to avoid people, because I've found that avoidance feeds my paranoia.

Much love to you!