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Originally Posted by pmbm
What about even telling your T that you need to talk about the really hard stuff? And tell her you can't do it without help. My T expects me to run my sessions, but if I ask her to take over for awhile, she will. Tell your T that your anger and pushing at her is probably a cover up for the big stuff. Tell her about the illegal ways of coping and about the dreaming. I hope that doing something like that can help her to help you.
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She expects me to run the sessions too, which is why we get nowhere. If i knew how to run my life I wouldn't need to be in therapy. If I give her free rein she wants to do energy exercises. without fail, which irritates me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisWayOut
how about being pushy and insisting that you guys talk about it. Even if she doesn;t respond when you read it to her, bring it back to the topic and keep pushing until she responds? you're still paying her (well, insurance will be anyway) so you should be getting something other than frustration out of the sessions. MAKE it a priority (unless it's more of pushing her on kicking you out, then... I dunno)
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And if I'm not even conscious of the reason I'm crying? How do I talk about that? I tried naming it last session and couldn't, and she suggested that maybe my tears were anxiety re: fear of abandonment, that the fear of being abandoned is like a background app running in my brain ALL THE TIME so it's always influencing me and I'm unable to turn it off or remove the program. Like a virus.