I really think, I operate in a state of perpetual blue-ness. Calm mellow, is how IRL, I am described. Kind, yes. Spunky, gawd no. Sassy, yeah, kinda have that quality. I find, I operate in a way, that says, I am just not going back 'there' to when I was 15. I operate, knowing how many of those I have loved, I have lost. And I mean, permanently lost, of this world.
Guess the trouble, I find myself with...is when I start speaking, everyone wishes I went back to that quiet closed off deeply serious girl. irl.