Enjoying being with a person, "loving" being with them and feeling comfortable and understood; that's love but I can see that it can also not be "let's get married". Love and in love are two different things? Think about your parents or best friend; you "love" them don't you? Are you "in love" with them?

My T had to teach me the difference between "like" and "love". I couldn't understand how I could love my stepmother (I did/do) and yet have serious problems/abuse issues? My T started out asking me who I really liked and I instantly answered, "Scott, my husband". So, she asked me, "What do you like about Scott?" and I, again, instantly answered, "He's warm, fun, and friendly." She then had me apply those to my stepmother, LOL, didn't fit! We then discussed how one wants to surround one's self with true "friends". I think that is what "your" boy is, a true friend. But he hasn't fallen in love with you (yet :-) perhaps.

I hear reflected in your discussion of him the exact same thing he's reflecting in his discussion with the busybodies :-) of you? Why can't he not want to leave you, want you to come be with him just because it's comfortable and would be so nice to have such a friend as you around? Beats having to be among strangers only and make new friends (maybe) and work at building new relationships, etc.? So much easier with two than alone?

I wouldn't worry about him and trying to figure him out so much as yourself :-) What do you want in relation to him. You said you don't want to marry him just to go along with a program set up by the parents/others? So make other friends and don't go with him and see what develops? If it's "love" for both of you, you'll get back together, won't be able to stay apart :-) but if one of you "gets over" the other and involved in other things, etc. then I would rather face that pain now than later when it blindsides me after a zillion years? Eat your vegetables first, get them out of the way, and either there will be dessert at the end or there won't anymore :-)