My P-Doc told me that some people benefit from therapy and some don't. She also went into detail the differences between the therapists and the p-docs which made things so much clearer for me. It seems she agrees that I need to handle my daily routines more within myself rather than sitting on the chair with someone who has no business dealing with what I have. My work allows me to be by myself most of the time. I also do things like coach kids and have learned to not become to social with the parents. I guess because as I get older my tolerance for all the BS is somewhat lacking. I find it better to be short with conversations and when possible keep my distance. I am learning that some of us are meant to be the way we are. I have a marriage that works well because of the ways my wife and I fit eachothers lives, it works perfectly. Having NPD is a challenge, there are many things that go along with this that are hard to understand when your looking from the outside to the in.
Your comment about getting older and having less feelings I think is normal. May be the tolerance is slipping as is mine. When your younger you find ways to either fit in or become the center of all around you. As we get older it becomes too much work and in turn our anger becomes more and our tolerance much less. I have also seen people for what they are which is mostly nothing special. Because of my NPD I have thought of myself as special or even "the chosen one". These are the realities that are anything but, just created for my ownself to deal with life. I am lost, I at times feel as if I understand then at other times I am in a complete mind tornado. Before finding out I always new something was off but was never able to put a finger on what it was(Even as special as I thought I was). Keep doing the research on NPD, look at your past and put the pieces together which can help create an answer to why. Do not expect for the ones who have caused this to help in the process as I have found many of times to do the exact opposite. Distance at times is our own best friend.
And yes if it quacks like a duck and has webbed feet it USUALLY is a duck but not always. Just look at us, we can look the part we want anyone to see and yet there is something else there that they cannot(reasons of the masks).