I am sorry that you are having to deal with this. it is great that you are trying to educate yourself on her illness. the more education you have the better you can understand her behaviors. I really hope that you don't in any way feel at fault or guilty for any of her behaviors. it is not about you at all. there is nothing you can do, no way you can act that is going to change the way she is doing things. only she can do that by getting herself treatment. for yourself, google for a nami family support group in your area. they can give you the coping skills to deal with your mother. it is kind of like an alanon for mental illness. take care of yourself.