What strikes me, is that you have been affected by society's (or, particularly, religion's) view of women's sexuality - that for women it should be something special, it should be restricted, it is shameful if spoken about or shown in public etc.

Get rid of these notions! They limit you! These perceptions about sex were MADE TO CONTROL FEMALE SEXUALITY. I am not joking, this is antropologically true of virtually every society throughout history, it gives the men (particularly the "alpha men") a knowledge of and control of their offspring and so forth. Religion has always been mostly about controlling female sexuality - some serious pervs, these religious authorities, thinking a woman showing hair or a leg or even a smile are sinful, that women's sexuality is somehow shameful and dangerous. This is one of the most promiment equality issues today, as women who embrace their sexuality are still slut-shamed, mocked, shunned, sometimes even assaulted or attacked.

My suggestion is: Free yourself. It takes time, but work your way through it. Don't do something you might regret, right now. But try to think it over: Why do you feel this way? You want to have sex, it's a natural, human urge; but cultural pressures make you feel like it's wrong. Aknowledge this. Talk to people. Not your stuck-up, Tea Party aunt but a friend, someone you can discuss with, maybe someone with another perspective on sex. (Don't start with porn, porn ruins sex.) But read about sex, masturbate, get to know your body. Don't be ashamed. It's natural to want sex. You are stopping yourself from living life to the fullest, you are inhibiting yourself.