I believe those things are actually true and maybe I need confirmation from my husband because 1) it's hard to believe 2) low self-esteem, probably from childhood trauma.

I've been told many times. My senior of HS, and I went to to small town HS because it was like a private school education for free. Anyway, I went to school 90/180 school days and kept a 3.8 gpa the entire year. And other things like how many guys I've dated that most girls would think is hot or guys who could date anyone they wanted. The times I doubt myself are the times when I think of a relationship that started while I was manic and the guy made me feel crazy. Which I probably was. I don't think it's grandiose to display self-confidence. And I'm actually not a really cocky or pretentious person but I do know I come off that way to some people. It's not intentional. Maybe cocky isn't the right word.