I saw my therapist today and shared with her my moods since last week as well as the month of August. There is only so much medication can do, which i've realized since getting out of the hospital on August 1. And i've come to terms with the fact that my disorder won't go away regardless of what i try.

Anyway, I've been reading a book called 'Breaking the Bipolar Cycle' and it has helped put things into perspective. My day is much more structured, as i do one house-keeping chore in the morning, go to an AA meeting at 11:30 and 1:00, go for a walk when i get back. My problem seems to hit me in the afternoon, where i start feeling very empty/bored/frustrated/depressed. I feel I haven't saved the world, which is what my ego wants me to do. I can't work part time or be in a relationship with a woman due to my illness, so what kind of goals do i set for myself?

I'm not bipolar 1 or 2, but rather bipolar not otherwise specified. So i can chill out once my moods start racing, for the most part. But why do i get this grandiosity if i'm not in a purely manic state?