Sex isn't shameful. It just isn't. It's what bonds people, it furthers our race, it keeps us healthy.

The problem is that we're living in a society with a lot of double standards and over sexualization. Younger people are confused, under educated and downright scared of the topic. And it's so wrong. If religion is an important factor for you then maybe getting the counsel of a religious leader would be beneficial.

If it's something that can't be rationalized maybe professional help would be the next course of action after that. You may need some time to talk through why this is such a source of conflict - you know logically that you're not going to appear a ***** for either casual sex or erotic photographs. *****s are people who are paid for their services. Therefore you are not whoring. Sex is also perfectly enjoyable whether you love someone or not though arguably there is a deeper emotional connection if it's shared between two people who love each other.

You use the term 'good girl' a lot. Are you an adult? If so you're not a good girl anyway. That's a contradiction in terms. I think maybe you're afraid of not enjoying it - of risking your reputation on something that might not even be worth it. My answer to the latter would be who cares - again if you're an adult you're not obliged to care what others think, the former is sadly inevitable - first time sex usually isn't great, especially if its shared between two people who are inexperienced.

I think you need to take the time to work out what this means for you. Sex isn't the same for everyone. For some people it's nigh on sacred. For others it's something less consequential. If you feel you need to wait - then wait. You're in charge.