Hello:
I don't give advise so, if I were in your situation, and I was, I'd start from where I am right now and begin figuring out how to have a more interesting and fulfilling life. I had a lot of trouble finding things to do and be interested after I left home but slowly began to find friends and opportunities to get out there and find a life I like. I did a lot of odd jobs, played some music for $$ and went into the Army at about 19 which really opened up a large world to me. I went to Europe, traveled around a lot over there and have done a lot of the things I wanted to do as a child but my best move was to get into 12 step support groups thanks to unhealed childhood issues from my "poor" family. Those support groups really opened me up and life has been ever upwards ever since. I am still not as BIG and IMPORTANT as I once wanted to be BUT life is pretty darned good and most if not all of my early childhood sadness and pain is GONE now! I wish I could tell you of a lot more things you could or should do but I don't give advise - just my own experiences for you to observe and maybe get some ideas from. I was very timid and frightened most of my life BUT strong friends and a desperate need to get beyond my family restrictions drove me to look around and find things to do or become.
One of my best friends introduced me to Hindu spirituality and teaching which is a powerful and magical thing - like Advaita Vedanta, Meditation & Yoga. Look up Deepak Chopra for starters. IMO, There's a huge, interesting and MAGICAL world out there!
good luck,
jim