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It would also follow that if I had something to offer in a relationship, that I would have been in a relationship by now or had real opportunities to be in one.
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Everyone has something to offer sweetheart. Finding out who you are and seeing all those things that are special about you, would help you to show that to others maybe? I am thinking you are quite young?? What people want for a relationship changes as you get older and all those superficial things become less important. Perhaps looking inwards and asking yourself deeper questions; what values you have, cultures/nature/places you wish to experience, what you are passionate about and what makes you 'tick', will cement all of those more important attributes and things that make people appealing to others with similar outlooks/interests.
I think you also need to stop being so hard on yourself and putting yourself down because that will also show in you and can put people off a little sometimes
You seem quite insightful, honest, sensitive, kind, intelligent, motivated and like you have a career goal? All this I have got from reading what you wrote, and these things about you are worth more than you give credit to imo.
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Clearly, I'm lacking in some area or several areas. And the excuses are a mix of things I can't do anything about and things that are just plain cruel, like I'm going to move someday and not live where I am now forever, I'm not in the right place in my life, I don't have enough experience (either sexual or relationship wise), I'm too weird/creepy/whatever, or I'm too fat
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I would say that sometimes you are lacking in kind and loving people if they are treating you like that! Would you want to be in a relationship with someone like that anyway? I am not sure I would want to give my love to someone that called people names and judged them, anyway. It's not a healthy place to be and would ultimately make you like that or very insecure and feeling for those other people.
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I'm size 10/12…so no, I'm not model-skinny, but not THAT fat
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Far from it!! Home made soups are a really good way of getting a lot of nutrients and filling you up and yet still very low cal. Or even low cal cuppa soups for in between meals. Lemon in hot water with sweeteners are good as the warm drink helps to satisfy any empty feelings I find (just because you mentioned not eating enough) But I think you should see your doctor if you feel you have a health problem like anaemia?
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How am I to know about common interests
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I didn't mean LOOK for a common interest with someone, more what are your interest?? and find a way of displaying that (e'g books, magazines about those things) and someone with the same interest will strike up a conversation about that. Leisurely classes is another good way to meet like minded people. Is there something fun you would like to learn?
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but whenever I make the first move, I'm seen as the bad guy or avoided. So apparently I'm doing something unforgivable by showing interest in them?
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Then perhaps don't. Just get to know someone without thinking along those lines and try and pick up on signals? make it clear that you don't want to just sleep with someone and so put that boundary there early on, and then just see how things go?
If you are just really wanting to be in a relationship then join some dating sites maybe? that way you know what they are there for when they talk to you. Nearly half of all relationships start on-line now so everyone is doing it
I hope this helped a bit x
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“You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars. In the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.”
― Max Ehrmann