So, hospice therapist came to the house yesterday for weekly grief therapy for h and myself ( suposedly myself but not really) anyway my h is getting good use out of this therapy, and I am happy about that. My h is opening up about his loss of his mom, He cried alot and so on. He also stated that he was concerned about me, and my sleeping pattern and my moods and behavior, which is ok, because there has been a change.

I hardly sleep, my moods are all over the place, my eating habits are poor, where I eat sometimes and sometimes I dont, ever since his mom died a month and a week ago. I always had trouble sleeping regardless, but now its worse. He told the t, that he is worried, because I seem depressed at times, which is true also.

The t asked me if it was true, I said yes, this t also knows that I have my own t. The hospice t says its part of grieving, I told her I am not grieving the person, but I am grieving the void of the caretaking role I had. She keeps insisting that I am grieving the person. Anyway, my h brought up the subject that was dropped many months ago, which was, that he wanted complete acess to my mental health records, like if he ever called my t or pdoc they could tell him anything about what I discuss in therapy.
For now , I only have him down as emergency contact. this has always bothered him. He brought it up again, He wants to be able to tell them how my moods have changed and my sleeping habits are poor, and what he can do to help, In the past I set up an appt, for him to see my t, he did not go. He wants t, to call him, or he wants to be able to call t, and have phone conversations, I told him, its not the way it works, they are very busy, she can see you in the office if you want, you can tell her your concerns, then she can discuss them with me. He is not content with this, he wants me to sign paperwork to release everything all information.

He does have control issues, him and his mom had a wierd relationship, where they would argue alot and make up, and laugh, and control each other, and they were happy like that. In the past , my pdoc, he has spoken to my pdoc over the phone, and it was ok.

The hospice t, then agreed with h, and said that its in my best interest, that he be a part of my therapy for continuity of my mental health, and that its a good idea that they comunicate with him, because my t and pdoc know me for 1 hour and h knows me for the rest of 23 hours. This gave h more power. H told hospice t, that my t and pdoc did not give him the time of day, that he cant just show up with me to a session, that the t needs to set up a special time.Hospice t, said "oh they are not flexible" OMG. I felt attacked.