Peri menopause. I'll have to look that up. It seems at 41 things got worse. Hormones have always played big in my moods. I was diagnosed once with PPMD, which is like super PMS. (Easiest way to describe it). I also get horrid migraines right before & after. I'm told to pray for menopause. Haha! I'm 43 now, Dx with BP 1 1/2 years ago.

Add stress, worry & anxiety and I'm a hot mess. I don't "deal" as well as I used to.

I want to be the best mom & wife I can be. Job or no job. Some of my children have BP and depression. All surfacing in mid-teens. I want to create positive changes and thoughts so I can be consistent and strong for them.

Ideally I'd want a low stress part time job, and love to go back to college. (I did finish my last course of study with 4.0 so I did accomplish that). My husband is a good man but I often wonder how he puts up with me. I don't want to add to his burdens. Unfortunately, instead of getting better jobs, each one has been worse than the previous one. I live in a right to hire, right to fire state, and employers can get away with low wages & high work loads. Though it also points to - the problem is me.

I just want to be a better person. Consistent, super-responsible & content. I suppose my post started about work (clear example) but obviously so much more than that.

thanks for listening!