Firstly a brief history of my problems, I was bullied all the way through my school days which meant i didn't make friends easily i even had my head rammed against brick wall which left me with permanent headaches, which in turn stopped me getting a career in the army at 18 years old, i then started working as a security officer, and was working between 15 and sometimes even 24 hours a day 7 days a week for several years which most of the time i was alone on sight for very long periods of time further isolating me from being social, i got married when i was 22 but the marriage only lasted for 2 and a half years and for more than 2 years of that my wife wanted another man but just stayed with me(i knew this was going on but tried to pretend it wasn't happening, which completely decimated my self esteem etc), she finally left me just before i turned 25 at which point i tried to overdose, at that time i got no help from any professionals and my GP's answer was to just change my medication, in the last 10 years i have tried to be referred to get some help with my many(and growing list of problems i will list more as i go on)but every time i get referred to see someone i get rejected this has happened to me 4 times now over the past 6 years about, a year after my first overdose attempt i met someone online who lives overseas and we struck up a relationship however only getting to see each other a couple of times a year and because we are both sick and don't work it made it virtually impossible that either of us could move to live with the other because of lack of money/government laws etc,she also has many problems including being bi polar,having asbergers syndrome, and ADHD, and compulsively lying to me and other people aslo, but was atleast getting help with some of her problems(whereas i am not which has caused problems for us) eventually after 6 years she has decided that because i am not getting any help she can no longer be with me which has led to us splitting up after i found out she had been cheating on with a man from north america for atleast a month(i should state here that i severed all ties and contact for almost the whole of august until she contacted me last night and that while she is still with this other guy she says how she is missing me and part of her wishes she hadn't dumped me and that she still doesn't know what she wants) and last month i made a 2nd suicide attempt, this time i was put under the south+west Yorkshire NHS mental health crisis team who put me on yet again more medication and then nothing except either calling me everyday or coming out to visit me at home for a mere two weeks before just simply discharging me back to my GP without even so much as trying to help me, every time i go to my GP i feel like i'm just getting palmed off with anti depressants and that its just wasting time for both me and the doctors so it makes me just not make an appointment and see about my many problems

now onto a list of things that i think is wrong with me

1;:constant low moods/loneliness all the time( with the odd occasional high moment/outburst of laughter or happiness when playing computer games or watching something however these can be quite rare)
2roblems with my nerves all over my body (shaking/tremble all the time, sometimes my legs shake that much when i get out of bed that i fall over and i have even had to have an operation on my left elbow to have the nerve moved as it is apparently too short and was effecting the feeling in my fingers, this sometimes still happens and is now starting in my right hand also)which is now constantly irritating/burning sensation/partially numb or painful at times which i haven't even tried to get seen to by the doctors for almost a year now
3:short temper and getting angry that can be set off by virtually anything at any time without warning which also effects my nerves making me physically tremble in my arms etc and my nerves kind of like get fried(not violent to others but have been known to throw things at the wall or even punching doors and walls)
4:i don't take care of my hygiene at all sometimes i can go months without bathing/showering brushing my teeth etc...
5oor diet i eat mostly sandwiches both hot and cold or i eat pizza's the odd microwavable meal but nothing even remotely resembling a decent cooked meal(i also can only cook things like sausages or burgers no proper meals that take alot of preparation or doing more than 1 thing at the same time)
6:bad concentration, infact the only thing that i can concentrate on is playing pc games/ocasionally watching movies/tv shows online it is the thing i have any interest in and helps me try to keep my mind of things and distract me from thinking about bad my life is
7:aches and pains in my joints and muscles all the time and my joints often lock up or constantly clicking(especially my neck, ankles,knees, and i crack my knuckles alot especially if i get angry) when i am moving, often nerves get trapped in my shoulders, neck and shoulder blades, i do zero exercise i rarely even leave the house
8:social awkwardness, i don't have any local friends(never been easy to make and maintain good friendships) only a couple of people i talk to online, i don't go out and socialize and when i do go outside of the house i always feel like people are staring at me which makes me not want to go out even more(even at home i just stay in my bedroom most of the time and avoid even talking to my brother whom i live with)
9:a constant ringing/ping noise in my head/ears(not sure which), i think they call this tinnitus or something(had this since i was about 19 years old(now 31) and never seen a doctor about it)
10:headaches almost every day(this has never been investigated by the gp's nor do i get any medication for my headaches i have to buy medication from the local pharmacy which most of the time i cannot afford to buy and the medication rarely works anyway
11:sound sensitive most of the time i can't stand it when there is too much noise, people are being too loud or playing music, too many sounds going on at the same time etc and this can really irritate my mood which leads to more short temper flaring etc
12:i constantly feel like there is something more wrong with me (in my head) more than just depression like the doctor thinks and is treating me for, i feel like whatever i go to my GP with i am not being taken seriously and just keep getting put on different types of anti depressants(i am now on my 5th different type of AD's in the last 7 years none of which have even remotely worked)
13:no motivation or will to do anything at all other than sit at the computer either playing or watching things online, i have no daily routine other than taking my medication and eating, i have been this way for years and don't seem to be able of even trying to break this cycle
14:muscle spasms/ cramp(especially in my feet these can get really painful to the point where i end up screaming out in pain) has even happened during sex which was really embarrassing and off putting for both of us
15:sleeping disorder,i tend to be up all night and end up sleeping during the day sometimes i can be awake for up to 72 hours or even more sometimes (when i split with my fiance at the beginning of august i didn't sleep for a week and had to be given sleeping pills to get me sleeping again) i have tried several times in the past to turn it around but have always failed to do so
16:constant worrying and inner stress that just doesn't go away,always feel like there is a thousand things going through my mind yet i just cannot pin them down or figure out what they are(being at my computer helps me concentrate/ get my mind off things(sometimes))
there is probably more things to list but i cannot think of them right now

so my question is what do you think is wrong with me/how to treat it? and how can start to get the help that i need to get my life back as the way things are now i don't have a life and it is only a matter of time before i try to take my own life again( i have made 2 attempts in the past 7 years the 2nd attempt being just a month ago)