You have the right to ask your T for changes...she also has the right to say no.

My T tried her "normal" approach with me first...it wasn't working. We have since had to keep adjusting: both of us. Things change: situations, people... You have to adapt or move on.

As far as the smiling, I can completely relate. My Pdoc is an intimidating woman. Once she started smiling, I started to feel comfortable with her. I, in a sense, reinforced her when she smiled and laughed, and now she does it much more often. So you don't necessarily have to ask her to smile more. Just when she does smile, tell her how much you value her smile.

Sometimes, you have to train your T