starfish - When I first went to T I didn't admit I SI, I said something like I picked at my skin. She let that sit and moved onto something else, Then later in the session when I was slightly more relaxed she asked me what I meant by picking. Then I actually described what I do and that it is more than picking.

I think that you'll find with a good T, they don't focus on the SI or try to make you stop. My T just checks in every couple sessions to see how much I SI and maybe asks one or two more questions about it. Therapists will know the real issue probably isn't the SI, but the trigger.

Try not to be afraid that you can't talk about it. Maybe give yourself permission to not even talk about it at the first sessions. Once you develop trust in someone you can bring it up.

No one else knows I SI besides my T and the pdoc I went to one time. I think that's ok with me for now. I too have a fear of loosing it because sometimes it feels good. That's what our minds do when they need a release and haven't found anything else that works.

I hope you give therapy a try.