Quote:
Originally Posted by kawaiigurl1981
he and I have decided to give it another try there is alot going on here and most of it likely stemming from a lack of communication.
|
Hello:
In virtually every failed relationship I was ever in, except for my current marriage, the lack of communication or more exactly BAD communication was the bottom line issue combined with a very serious lack of good relationship skills. My parents were both very bad examples of relationship skills so I left home empty handed of good relationship skills and knowledge which made a big mess of my life later on.
If I were in your situation, I would take the time to read books on relationship skills or google: relationship tips to LEARN HOW to make it work. We both studied and use the same stuff because it won't work if only one partner knows what to do while the other one is still LOST in ignorance.
All I have to say is that knowing and using these simple relationship skills has made our marriage easy, fun, happy, loving, trustworthy, SEXY and ever improving!
Quote:
|
As long as he is real and honest with me about his wants and needs and I am prepared to love him where he is at.
|
The relationship skills that we learned place 100% HONESTY & TRUTH at the very top of the heap because without CONSISTENT honesty, there can be no trust and without trust why bother to be in any relationship? Being totally honest was difficult for me but I finally got it!
Quote:
|
He is very closed off, he does not communicate with me or confide in me, there is very little self disclosure from him which bothers me and prevents me from seeing where he is coming from. He says that that as the man he is supposed to take care of me and not burden me. I told him that it did not work that way and I had a hard time loving someone that would not make themselves vulnerable to me.
|
Relationship skills teach people how to open up and talk more and more freely and share sensitive subjects with each other as Trust and Respect builds between them. We are able to talk about ANYTHING, ANYTIME since we are Best Friends and have NO SECRETS from each other. It takes a while to become that trusting and open but it's worth it to get there.
good luck,
jim
