Thanks Kaliope - it helps to know that someone understands what I'm struggling with. I still really want to reach out to T, but I know she doesn't respond to texts or calls after 9 pm, and it's nearly that now. Maybe I'll feel better in the morning, and if not, I can always call her then. I just really don't want to bother her. She's gone above and beyond this past month, in being there for me, talking to me on the phone in between sessions for as long as half an hour. I don't want to wear out her goodwill. I don't want her to be annoyed with me. I need her support too much for that.