There are some people who will just drain you to death. It may not be totally their fault, but it kind of is too, if they refuse to work on it. You *have* to put yourself first. Like I told my T a while ago, if I can't take care of myself, how can I expect to be able to take care of anyone else. I agree with Nowhere; you have to learn to keep these people a little distant from your heart. Otherwise they will literally kill you. Slowly and painfully. It's not that they're any less important, it's just that they are perhaps not able to give in the way that a truly close friend can.