((Jane)),

What you are discribing is mostly the PTSD talking. It's important that tiny part that says you are worth it gets stronger. It will with time and patience.

Yes, what you are working through now is the hard part, getting it out and all into words, yes, it's hard work. People who don't know about PTSD truly cannot appreciate how much work it really is either. That is why "support" from people who do is so important.

Remember, the "Need = Guilt" is what you were told growing up, but, it is also a symtom of complex PTSD too. In fact a lot of people who struggle, including myself, has to distance from family who tend to reinforce the "Need = Guilt" in their comments.

As far as your son is concerned, you did spend time with him and all children want our attention all the time. Your teaching him about taking time outs is important, he will need to be able to request that himself at some point too. And he will also need to learn that "need doesn't have to mean guilt", he needs to understand not only his needs but the needs of others too.

((Hugs))
OE