Hi, Daycia. Could you see if there's a clinic around that takes people on a sliding scale? Or maybe an individual therapist who takes people on a sliding scale? I agree that you need to get some professional treatment.

That said, I am not sure about this boyfriend. He certainly doesn't sound good for your mental health. He is abusive. I don't care that he was reacting to you. Spitting and choking are terrible things to do to somebody. And the stuff with other girls is not good at all.

We are here for you, and you can make some friends here. Many people will understand what you are going through.

Have you checked out the Survivors of Abuse forum? They can tell you what they think about your boyfriend.

And the Anxiety forum is a good one, too.

Let us know what's happening, please.