To the OP: it sounds to me like your T just wants you to be responsible, but I'm not so sure if I agree with his method.

Therapists really need to be careful when using anger IMNSHO. I don't have substance abuse problems, but I do have issues with emotional intimacy and being used as a 'sink' for others' anger and painful emotions. My previous T tried to get me to respond through using anger and all she ended up doing was reinforcing the belief that I was difficult to deal with and that I do nothing but upset people when I try to get my needs met and that I have absolutely no right to be angry.
So, I'm touchy on the whole anger thing, pretend or otherwise. It's like fighting fire with fire. You (therapists) really need to know what you're doing if you choose to go there.