Hi hazelgirl, no matter what, you are going to feel the guilt, no matter what anyone tells you, even your t, like mouse says, just feel the guilt, you might think I am nuts, but this is what I do. I let myself feel the guilt, I give myself a sentence, like a mini trial, even if I am not wrong, Im my own judge and jury, depending on the situation, I will say, ok I give myself x amount of days to feel guilty, after that I allow myself to open the jail cell and let myself out into freedom, be out on parole, because I have done my time. If that does not work, then if I am still ruminatinating about it, I know its not healthy, not that it was to begin with, but then its time to process this with t,. This is just me.
My t knows I do this, this is just part of feeling my emotions. she rather I dont feel guilty for things I dont need to feel guilty over, but its all part of sitting with my emotions, so we are seeing where this goes.