I'm sorry that it was "no picnic" for you and hope that you can see how bad parenting may have caused whatever that "no picnic" thing was. It certainly hurts my feelings that my sister and I were not good friends until much later in life when I finally understood the terrible parenting blunders that set all of us kids up to be jealous, abusive & spiteful ENEMIES from day one. I imagine that bad parenting might be useful if only to show a kid how NOT TO BE when it's their turn to be a parent. Are you a parent now?
I wish I could offer my parents the same excuses for their parental failures but, since they clung to the notion that they did the very best they could and that us kids DESERVED the brutal punishments that we got, I find it impossible to excuse or over look their mistakes even though I fully understand WHY they were such bad parents. My parents would NEVER have "reached out" to learn anything about parenting since they were completely convinced that they were EXPERTS after helping to raise their own many siblings. I can appreciate how many people wish to excuse and absolve their parents of wrong doing in order to FORGIVE them and make peace with the past but, IMO, it will take some JUSTICE to help me forgive my very dysfunctional parents, especially since neither of them were ever willing to take any responsibility for their horrible handy work which eventually sent my brother to prison for ARMED ROBBERY!
I believe that anger is the appropriate response to INJUSTICE and mindless brutality and that JUSTICE is the first step to loosing or reducing one's anger over the violations of INJUSTICE. But, I am on my way to "getting over it" even if it doesn't seem like it or I am not moving as fast as others might wish.
I solute all of you who have forgiven and excused your inadequate parents and found peace for your self.
jim