To pills...any pills....prescription, over the counter, you name it....my self injury has proved not enough....i take 6 sudaffed one night...or three....or two....just to get me to the place where im exhausted and my heart is racing and i can barely breathe...its no longer meant to be a fatal act...only to get to the point where i completely lose consciousness for an hour or two....i want some tonight....but im holding myself back...i know if i keep taking six a night it wont turn out well for me...i heard dying from liver failure is one of the most painful horrible ways to go.....unless im mistaking it from something else....i dont know....im such a hypocrite that its pathetic...i come on here and talk about how horrible my alcoholic father is....and im going on my like 7th day abusing pills....i know i need help....im going to try and keep myself from becoming my father before it gets any further....if something DOES happen and they find out about the pills i will never be allowed to become an RN or something bigger....my future wil be screwed....i feel so bad for my liver...poor thing....bless its little heart..if it had one...thanks for listening to my rant
love, inny