Thanks for your replies. I didn't mean to compromise my existence here on pc. Though I guess if I give up, I am compromising it.

Work....I'm happy to be employed. I know I'm lucky. I also like working, it takes my mind off things. I like being challenged. But not like this. September is a deadline for many things, it's nearing the end of the year. Many financial reports need to be given. And I'm not ready. Nowhere near close. My boss understands that I'm overworked yet when it comes down to it, he still expects it done.

I can't take it. I had two anxiety attacks today during work that my employees witnessed. It's too much but I have no way out. I have to continue on though the depression is sapping my energy. I can barely get to work these days, I dread it.

I lost complete control. After all these years it happened.