I have days where I wake up out of the blue and just can't. I've actually called out more due to random bouts of depression this year than I have to physical illness.

My last depressive episode was worse than it's been in years. There is a point where, when it gets really bad, it's actually safer and better for me to be at work and occupied, pushing as hard as I can, like Sisyphus, than it is for me to be at home. Because at home I'll sink. I'll get even worse. So during my last episode, I worked. I told my boss how I was feeling though, so that she knew I was sick. Can you talk to your boss about this sort of stuff?

Your depression isn't out of the blue. You're mourning and it's completely understandable. But it's snowballing and you said it -- you're isolating. That's one of the worst things. We all do it when we're depressed, and it makes the depression heavier (I say this now, but we all know what I'm gonna do the next time I get depressed). And the thing is, the longer you stay out, the guiltier and more ashamed and anxious you're gonna feel, and then the more depressed you'll get . . . and pretty soon you'll have a snowman and it's only September. There's one way to put a stop to that. Limit yourself.

One of the tactics I use is by trying to be an observer of my feelings. I try to separate myself from them when I can. You know when you're depressed and you suddenly get distracted from your ruminating and those feelings are still there, but kind of in the background? It's like that. To be honest, I do not think I would be able to do that at all if I weren't on meds.

You're not a failure. You're sick. But you can't let this illness beat you. You have to fight and you have to win.