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Originally Posted by healingme4me
(May need trigger for mention of sui)
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What is "sui"?
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I found myself unleashing many 'a vent filled with anger and blame towards my parents while I went through resolving all of that pain. People do eff up, every day.
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What is "eff up"?
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My exh has a half brother in prison, same thing, I've a paternal uncle who was on and off in prison, until the last time, now it's permanent.
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Sorry about that. My brother is now living a normal life.
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I've a cousin, in prison for a long time. That group of cousins, distant contact, not because of being enemies, just by virtue of who's an addict and who isn't, safety thing.
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I'd guess that all of them are victims of some kind of INADEQUATE parenting.
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My dads family, bit off kilter, but it's tough to demonize completely my grandparents, as it's tough to completely demonize my uncle,rest his soul,and his wife.
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I sure wouldn't "demonize" anyone for their bad parenting or being the victims of bad parenting BUT calling something what it is seems appropriate to me which is why I am certain that bad parenting caused my brother to end up in jail. The story of how that all occurred is pretty long so I will spare others the trouble of reading it. Maybe others can see this in their own family and life if they look deeply and seriously enough.
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And certainly my ex husbands father was sui, when he was three so, who's to say half brothers mother was completely to blame for his choice to pull a gun?
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I have no idea what "sui" means but I am dead certain how and why bad parenting finally contributed to my brother's choice to commit armed robbery. I don't "blame" them for what he did but I absolutely blame them for setting him up to finally go there! Fortunately for him, he found some better and healthier role models in and after Prison to overcome the unhealthy conditioning our parents placed in him years before. The only reason that I did not submit to my parents inadequate programing was that I was extremely afraid of authority figures and never had the GUTS to turn to crime like my brother did. I often admired his courage to go against authority but never had the nerve to join a gang and pull off jobs!
Cool! How are you dealing with your anger?
good luck,
jim
