My kids on the other hand.... they just know that mommy doesn't feel good again. They are older now, ages 12, 15 & 17 so it's not so hard now.
They probably understand a lot more then you give them credit for.


But I really wish I could be like all the other mothers out there. Have the energy to keep up with everything. And not feel bad with myself when it takes everything out of me just to get up & take them to an after school event. Little unknown secret they're as messed up too in there own special way.

I am so angry with myself because they are growing up and I feel as if I'm missing out on EVERYTHING!! I know that as long as they know I love them so much & I show them as much affection as I can that, that's all that matters...But it's not. I could do so much more... but I can't. I can't find it in me to motivate myself to be more. To do more, to make the most out of every moment. I really hate my problems because of this

In the larger picture you haven't missed out on everything. Yes there are times that BP will get in the way of everything but so does finances, work schedule, sickness, general life and their own baggage for the general population. At least this is what I tell myself. I completely understand the feeling but realize we, especially on PC, are trying everything we can to not let our issues get in the way of our parenting. We know we have issues and try to make up for that which in general makes us better parents from the start. We're hard on ourselves because we want the best for our children and BP some times makes us feel inferior but we're not.