I'm so sorry that you're in the same boat. I wish you didn't have to be. But we can do this.

I messed up today - huge. And I still "want" more. I've been having rocky days since Friday when I last binged. I scheduled an appointment with a therapist on Friday night for Tuesday morning. Come Monday night, and I cancelled it. Waited for the office hours to end so I could call the answering machine and cancel, too. Just as I waited until the last possible second on Friday to schedule the appointment - no chance that they would be able to bring me in then.
All of Monday night, yesterday and this morning, I have been balancing on the edge, then at around 10AM I fell over. On the wrong side.
But I still think I can do it.

I've had three successes this year, the longest a month, but they still count. I have a goal now - Christmas! It's roughly 100 days away and I really want to reach triple digits. And I want to throw out the 1,5 pints of Ice Cream that I'm staring at right now. Went and bought them earlier, and a box of chocolates. But I don't want them. I feel disgusting, bloated and nauseous because of all the food I ate even before I bought the sugar.

I joined a website where I literally just bet myself that I can go 5 weeks without binging - and I'll have to pay money each week I can't make it. I'm a student - if I can spend money I don't have on food for my binges, I can put it down on hope, too. If I don't binge, no money spent. If I do, I'll have to actually pay for it. It's worth a shot!

Standup2me - we can do this. I truly believe that we can. The three weeks I went without overeating, I kept repeating "It's just food", trying to make it less significant.

It's just food.