Hello Lexi.
I am very sorry you are feeling guilty at this time. It is very hard to feel safe in telling a therapist that you SI. In time you will probably gain the confidence needed to tell the therapist that you SI and get the help you need regarding the SI. Until then though it is very important that you get the therapy you need so that you can regain control over the SI through getting the therapeutic help you need until you feel strong enough to let your therapist know about the SI. Take care and good day Lexi (good to talk to you in chat today). Have a great weekend. Soidhonia