I thought I'd finished therapy but then am currently going through this really challenging transition period and felt like I was having a breakdown so I scheduled an appointment with my therapist.

The appointment started out on a topic related to my relationship that I'm still SO uncomfortable discussing, and I was so anxious and embarrassed, and I truly pulled out all the stops: refusing to look at him, staring around the room, crying, covering my face, demanding to leave, not saying goodbye properly, refusing to answer questions. I've never acted like this before; my therapist even said, "I've never seen you in this state before."

So my partner wants us to go see a couples/sex therapist together, and he doesn't think I should go back to my individual therapist just yet. He thinks it is too much and that I put too much anxious energy into thinking about sessions with my individual therapist. He doesn't think therapy should be so hard. He also doesn't think my individual therapist can help us with our current relationship issues.

I don't know what to do. I want to e-mail my individual therapist and apologize, but don't want to take advantage of his time, and also don't know whether to schedule another appointment or not. It took me a few days to recover from our last one. He knew I was hiding things from him and was pushing me to talk about them. He stayed with me for 45 minutes past our regular time, and even though I have all these doubts, I don't doubt that he cares, and I wonder how important that is. I know I caught him by surprise and even *I* was caught by surprise; I was doing really awesome before this past session and had only been seeing him once a month or so.

I just don't know what to do. I wonder if I've been in too much therapy. I'm wondering if I'm taking this one crying episode too seriously. I wonder if I just need to cut ties with my individual therapist and place my hopes in a new couples one and in my relationship. I don't know if I can see them both since my individual therapist sees me on sliding scale and also the couples therapist offered to see me on sliding scale and I don't want to take advantage of them and want them to definitely know that I'd be seeing two people but also am afraid that, after telling him about it, my individual therapist will say, "oh, well OK, looks like we can't talk anymore!"

Blah. I just don't know what to do