It's really a very positive thing, Delicatefade, that you recognize you how difficult it has become for you to stay within the boundaries your therapist has set. Kudos to you! I do think, however, that your therapist, as caring and supportive as he is toward you, needs to shoulder the majority of responsibility for this problem. He has said to you that you will need to "take a break" from therapy if the boundary violations continue. What you and he need to do is sit down at your next session and state clearly what will violate the boundary and what the consequences will be for the next violation. For example: If you email or text me for anything other than rescheduling issues, your next session will be cancelled and we will reconvene two weeks later at our regular time to discuss what happened. If you repeat the violation, your next two sessions will be cancelled and so on.

I hear you saying that the texting and emailing isn't helping you; in fact, it's causing you a lot of anguish about being terminated. You recognize that your therapist has the right to say that he doesn't want to to deal with crisis texting and emailing. It puts him in a powerless position, questioning whether or not he needs to call the police to do a wellness check on you. Believe me, you DO NOT want the police called to do a wellness check! But if the texting and emailing continues, that will probably be his only option.

Maybe the two of you could agree that when you're feeling this desperate and SI, you will agree to go to the ER and call him from there to let him know that you got there safely. Then you and he could meet at your next session to talk things over regarding how that worked for you.

Your other option is to consider finding another therapist. There are therapist who allow crisis emailing and texting. From the way you talk about your therapist, I'd guess you don't want to do that and I think that what you really want to do is stay with this therapist. If you like him and feel supported by him, then go to your session and find a way you can honor his boundary but still get your needs met to be supported and nurtured during difficult times. I hope you two are able to come up with a workable solution!