I sense that you're feeling out of control of your therapy, and want to reassure you that you are in control. You don't need to see two and I don't think either is acting inappropriately. You're the expert on yourself, so it's up to you to leave if it's best. He won't refer you just because you don't like his style.

I know two therapists work for some (though I think it's often because they're working on two different issues, like an eating disorder with a specialist and relationship issues with another, so I get that) but mine advises me it's best to keep the relationship in the relationship: I work through my concerns about her with her. If I couldn't, I'd leave. Not to say I've never done a reality check elsewhere, but at the end of the day, I strengthen the relationship and heal the transference by being honest and assertive with her directly.

As for it feeling unfair to you that he's not interested in exploring your romantic feelings for him... what are you looking for specifically from him in that regard? I can see how he wouldn't want to 'explore' if that meant increase the attraction, some providers really don't just go there.