I see this turned into a very long thread...can't read through it all but have skipped some messages on way through.

I still don't think you are getting the point....I don't think (IMO) there is anything you can do right now that can fix this. You need to stop being a brat and accept she just isn't into it right now. IMO you are worrying about all the wrong things as I see you are posting the same problems.

Your poor wife is probably very ashamed, embarrassed and alone right now when it comes to sex.

You need to let her know that it is fine, because I assure you she will sense its not from your behaviour and the dissatisfaction she senses. Once she feels comfortable enough, maybe she will open up about it. But you must first drop this and make it entirely about her...not what you WANT but what is it SHE NEEDS!

I hope you have learned something from this thread.

Do you have any idea what your wife might be going through to have sex with you at all? Maybe she already is making an effort? Maybe you should think yourself lucky to have sex with a woman that really isn't into it - WHAT I mean by that is, feel lucky she isn't totally saying no. Maybe this is all she can give? You keep saying she was into it at first ...well yeah buddy, things change as we get older!

Has anything happened to knock her confidence? Sometimes I don't want to have sex because my self esteem or confidence is at a low ebb. There are so many things to take into consideration. Has she put on weight? Has anything traumatic happened to her?