I'm sorry. I just love her so much. I was so upset this morning. I felt so trapped inside of myself because I felt like I couldn't tell anyone what was really going on. I protected her from what's really going on with me and I let myself unravel for a few months. Then, on the park bench, I sat real close to her and she asked me what's really going on. I started to cry. She said I don't deserve to live in pain forever and I don't have to be tormented like this. "Sweetheart please let me help you with this. You don't have to be alone. I can't talk you through the memories but I can talk about the feelings you have about the memories. Please darling I want to help you. It doesn't have to be this way". I talked just for under five minutes about the feelings surrounding it and I feel so much better. I feel less trapped and less hopeless. Maybe it will only last a day but I love her so much just for helping me break out of my thoughts even for the day.