Quote:
Originally Posted by growlycat
I think that early on my main T knew that silences seemed hostile to me yet he did it anyways. I'm not sure if it was to "let the feeling come out" so we could discuss it or, he was trying to get me used to the idea that silence can be caring and nurturing.
Sometimes I think T's see discomfort coming but don't stop it because it is all "grist for the mill".
However, I don't believe that a good T would do something very hurtful just to bring up an issue.
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Yes, I believe this is all true (and my T also keeps quiet a lot of the time, which sometimes feels uncomfortable but on the whole is very helpful). A T should not help their clients avoid uncomfortable topics and feelings, I think. But provoking discomfort, especially when it comes to the relationship with the T (and
especially especially between sessions) sounds unnecessarily cruel and manipulative.
It could be a good and necessary thing for some clients, in some situations - there are never any absolutes.