Quote:
Originally Posted by BipolaRNurse
Your husband is both physically and emotionally abusive, and he will NEVER change because it's too easy to stray over that line again once it's been crossed. In fact, this is a classic abuse pattern: he hurts you or threatens you, then acts all nice for a few weeks or months as if he was sorry for what he did.....until the next time he gets angry with you.
He is also gaslighting you (making you feel crazy by telling you things like you don't remember events correctly) and is verbally abusive as well. How much of this are you going to endure before he drives you off the deep end or kills you? This is only going to continue to escalate as he becomes bolder (because he's gotten away with the abuse all this time---what's going to make him stop?).
Please, take your kids and go to the nearest women's shelter ASAP. It's only going to get worse if you don't fight for yourself!!
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This is EXACTLY what is going on. Classic emotional and physical abuse in content and in pattern, topped off with gaslighting. And escalation, yes. The line that gets crossed moves closer to hell every time. It's insidious. A side note to that -- one person gets accused of being "at fault" increasingly till they are blamed for everything, and the other for nothing. Could that be an accurate assessment of reality? Of course not! Get out while you have the sense to see that. Because, as inconceivable as it sounds, by the time it gets to that point, the blamed one actually
believes they are always at fault.
Would BP make that all/nothing imbalance of blame any less twisted a perception of reality? NO. Believing your BP might make their reaction more justifiable will only get you to that inconceivable point faster.
You don't want to go there. Even if you could excuse it all away for yourself, is that what you want your kids to grow up with?
(Especially seeing how he attacked you pregnant, it's taking a lot of restraint to not point out worse.)