Courts, I've discovered are pretty busy, and trial divorces seem a thing of either, the past, or of movies.
In my state, starts with the filing, then probate clerk for mediation. Then a couple more court dates. Most of the work of divorce is done outside of the judges chambers.
Most are ruled under irreconcilable differences.
It does seem confusing that he's staying in contact with you, instead of just working through an attorney?
It's natural to want to lash out, after feeling betrayed. There's many things, I thought my ex would say in court, yet, when it came down to it, court is a very busy place. And it's done here, in a non private manner. There's other people waiting in the courtroom.