Quote:
Originally Posted by Leah123
Sorry you're struggling.
I think it's okay to feel preoccupied about seeing your regular therapist again.
What concerns me is the return of your harmful behaviors: just based on that, have you considered staying with your current (summer) therapist? (Edit: Now that I read again though, I see you're saying the *urges* are returning, but are you able to maintain your progress and control the behaviors? I think that's an important distinction.)
Or could you see them both?
I hear that you value the bond, I really do too, but if you're actually healing and improving with your current therapist, there seems to be a lot of value there.
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Thanks Leah (:
Yes I have maintained my progress but it's only been less than a week since she called and I feel like I'm slipping. I'm thinking about seeing her again all day and then I just get frustrated and want a release.
I somehow don't think I was really healing with temp T, I think I was just staying distracted more b/c I had nothing to look forward to anyway. Now it's like I don't know whether to value my real life or escapes. Seeing main T makes me feel alive again, it's just the only thing that does....
I don't know
I'm struggling to like admit to myself that this state could be less healthy. I don't know what to think. I don't want to lose main T.... ugh. Tbh it's probably more about seeing her than getting help but I want to see her so much. And she did help me heal a lot before even if it was very rocky.
Isn't feeling your true feelings better than just going thru the motions? ><